Welp...

 

"But They Don't Live In A Cave..."

 Tonight's offering is a set of Reaper's "Black Bear Clan" cavemen - plus one - for the game "Palaeo Diet - Eat or be Eaten" game.

L to R - Thug, Klunk, Ooga, Thunk, Ugh.

The "plus one" is, of course, a Citadel "Big Momma" barbarian girl (aka, Ooga). I found her while I was getting minis together for Palaeo Diet, and figured that she'd fit in well as an extra spear if needed. Naturally, she's a metal mini where the guys are all Reaper Bones Black.

"Werewolf?" "There wolf!"

Bones Black, as I may or may not have mentioned, is a vast improvement over original Bones, but it can still be a pig's ear to work with. As you can see, I left more than my usual share of mold lines on them, because they don't come off all that easy. Also, there is still a problem with warped parts, as seen with Ugh's spear. No matter how many hot water treatments it got, it still went back to the curved position. 

A solo of Ooga, cos I liked how her face turned out.

A fun little diversion. Of course, I still have a lot of wildlife to paint and some appropriate scenery (including a warped - surprise, surprise - hut) as well, but this stuff is fairly quick and easy to paint. I'll also look to see if I have any other "Big Momma" figures that might work for the game (seriously, who at old Citadel came up with that name?).

"Klunk, yoo idgit!"

Well, time to get on my backlog of commission work for Ral Partha Legacy - work and such was keeping me from getting that stuff done, but now I better get cracking!

Chaos Amazon

 ...or Kinky Chaosette, if you wanna be nasty.

/Janet Jackson

The Hair that ate Marienburg

Here she is, Michael Perry's Chaos Amazon/Amazonia Gothique/Kinky Chaosette, painted as a Champion of Khorne (naturally) and a shield design that came out of nowhere. I didn't really want to do the usual asymmetrical demon face shield that you usually see given this mini, but I wanted to try something challenging.

Needless to say, unless you've been living under a rock (or just not into gaming miniatures - so why are you here? :P), you know that this figure was based off of John Blanche's excellent "Amazonia Gothique" painting.

The face of a woman who is not worried about you.

Supposedly this is a rare-ish mini (recasters aside). Having said that, I really don't remember when/where I got this one. I got her a long time ago, but surely not way back in the 80s when she was sculpted, so not part of the White Dwarf promotion. Ah well, I guess it is a mystery.

A year or two ago, Games Workshop released a special character for the new Necromunda that is heavily based on this miniature. 

Strong family resemblance.

...yeah, I really need to get her too. Probably paint her the same way, as well.

A last shot of her against an experimental canvas painted by the missus:

Seems fitting!

Hmmmmmmm, just learned that Hasslefree has been working on this one too...

Yes, please, I'll take two!

Just Boosting Post Count - Nothing to See Here...

 Here are some quick quickies - Reaper Bones "Wall of Fire" spell effects. I mostly put them together with "Paleo Diet - Eat or Be Eaten" in mind, but could be used for anything. 

Heheheheheh, Fire! FIRE!

Simple enough, really - slap translucent flame on 40mm wooden disks that I've had forever, flock, partially paint flock black, attempt OSL and DONE. Might get a pack or two more (three per $5 pack - decent enough) depending on how pyromanic the players with torches get.

More Turd Polishing

 Easy stuff this time. 

To start - I really like Reaper Miniatures and their crazy-ass offerings, but I never really could get behind their Bones line. For sure, the material has improved to the point that it little resembles the bendy unworkable crap that it once was, but it still has issues that annoy the hell out of me - not being able to use spray primer/sealer on them being a big one. Warped spears, swords, etc. being a close second.

Bless their hearts though; Reaper has put a LOT of effort in promoting the Bones line, even resorting to giving them away by the handful (especially true of the early white ones). Swag bags, paint-n-take tables, you name it. 

Naturally, this lands me with miniatures that I'd never buy and have no idea what to do with them. Here, that is realized in the following two miniatures, a couple of sea hag types (the tall one has a name like Mags Grindylow or summat). These sat in a parts box for a loooong time until I started reading Robert Howard's original Conan stories. I always loved that a lot of his supranational entities were often vague shadows, sometimes with animalistic characteristics (the critters in "The Phoenix on the Sword" and "The Scarlet Citadel" are a little like this).

Hey, says I - rather than try to paint these bendy, low detail bits of nonsense with a good paint job, why not paint them black with a couple indifferent drybrushings and call it a day? And if I feel REALLY frisky, I can use OSL on their glowing eyes...

Something something bad photos

I probably did the most work on prep with these things - attempt to remove mold lines, base them and (in the case of Mags), cut off the S-shaped trident pole and affix it directly to her arm, rather than use her low-detail empty fist. Some first time attempts at OSL for the eyes (Mags was the second attempt and far better), and that's it. Probably 30 minutes paint time each, blindingly fast for me.

Boring butts

Hah, yeah, bad pics again. These are a lot darker in reality than here. But now I have a couple shadowy minions for any game I care to use them in. Not bad for a couple of hopeless throwaway-level figures!

Big Booby Ballista Batallion

(Or, why you should always make sure your pictures don't suck before you pack up the miniatures.)

As life feels to be on a more even keel these days, I have been making more time for hobby work. A couple months ago, I reached out to Jacob at Ral Partha Legacy to see if he needed any miniatures painted for their website. As it turned out, he did and had quite a list of miniatures to choose from. One of the first sets to catch my eye (of course) was the Amazon ballista and crew. I say "of course" because these ladies (sculpted by Tom Meier) are quite noticeable due to their exaggerated female proportions (they have big boobs for the thickies in back).

And I do mean exaggerated.

Odd really - I bought a blister pack of Amazons from the OG Ral Partha a lifetime ago, and they had very athletic (downright skinny) forms, and were nude (these were also sculpted by Meier). Somewhere along the line, someone looked at these and said, "no, there proportions will not do. Tom, get the sculpting putty out - you're putting in overtime."

Originals on the left, Heroic Scale on the right.

SOMEone's got a fetish. Not complaining, mind you, just pointing it out.

As RP Legacy gives you copies of the miniatures you paint upon successful completion, this is a really good deal. I mostly wanted the two ballistae that come with the 6 crewwomen, but I will certainly find a place for the ladies themselves - probably in a Dragon Rampant army.

Thanks to my weird schedule, extra shifts and the hell of being on call often, it took me about 1 1/2 months to finish them. They really don't look all that bad either, even after a near-disastrous experiment with bronze armor. Couldn't do the eyes though - Meier miniatures are teeny and they have helmets on. After I finished, I took a bunch of pictures for Jacob to see that I was done, boxed them up and sent them on their way.

Then I looked at the pictures.

UGH.

This is amateur hour, folks. 

I bought a new photo box from Reaper miniatures recently. Pretty nice really - even has a built-in light strip. Word of advice, never use the light strip. Harsh, ugly light, washes the colors out and makes their surfaces looks super rough. Their armor doesn't even look metallic FFS. 

I post these not to harm my readers, but to remind myself to tear out the damn light strip.

Always gotta show the butts.

So yeah - check the pics before packing.

I took one of the backs of the ballistae without the lights for some reason - so much better and closer to reality...

Ballistae Butts.

ANYways - once Jacob get the miniature back form me, we'll see if I want to do more for him (I do - there is a ratling artillery set and some troglodytes that have my eye), and I'll get copies of these girls and their engines of destruction. The Amazons will probably be painted up the same way as here, but they'll all get spears to hold (I think these are meant to be "artillery tools". I painted the stubby spears up like the ballista bolts to designate those girls as the loaders.) The ballistae will be generic for whatever army/game needs them.

Last note - Meier sculpted the Amazons themselves, no clue who sculpted the ballista. Whoever it was, that person is on "Gitkikka's List Of People Wot Need To Be Spanked", just for sculpting all those damn studs!